CTR LEGACY THREAD

[JaH BLaZe]

hot to death i am , like that budhist monk on fire
forever droppin verses, who's the one to retire
not me, and its not like im in some kind of hot phase
niggaz got me, cuz heats in my name - Jah BLAZE
i write for heads in HTML ,say what you will son
burn web pages up like farenheit four fifty one
and what you know? pray to a sun god for what you believe in?
i burn the place up more than lebron comin back to play cleveland

[dubs]

I see a lot of faggots, flamers, and lots of qweahs
(No Nelly) When i say its gettin hot in here
While you scroungin' for pot and beer
Thinkin 2010 was not my year
I be loungin, countin stacks n coppin gear
You shop at Sear's, rockin some dated Lee's
Hatin on me, cuz im movin weight n trees
You dont stay blunted, you smoke hay with seeds
Temperature's Rising, ayo i hate the D's
Keep it a hunid, you faggots like 98

[JaH BLaZe]

type four bars while I'm takin a shit
I got more brown bars but I'm makin it quick
but I stopped to type, not to rock a mic
just to drop my shite, now I got to wipe

now I got to wipe the slate clean like Radio Raheem
gotta be on some new shit , this a new year, nahmean
while some of yall niggas are rippin it , it aint hard to tell
most of yall are jus hangin around like d angelo barksdale

[ALASKA]

but if you do check out this new contest at my site

http://www.syffal.com/floppy-seconds-january

[Philaflava]

[boycottamericanwomen]

phuck yea, dude

[AzMa]

very nice multi syllable rhyming.

[JaH BLaZe]

it's a cold cold world
no man should know
sometime's the direction's unknown
cats sprung from corrections come home
to a place they got to exist in and survive but find they hate
no corporations are willing to take em once property of state
and even niggas never been a con are on unemployment lines
take the subway to the office and take a number and wait
the subzero temps set the mood for this, no joke
you can see your breath in this bitch ,it looks like smoke

[JaH BLaZe]

I like
Reflective like light from a phase of the moon

nice drop nay

[Thun]

Excellent.

[unclebengi]

I don't write much anymore, but readin some of this inspired me a lil...thought I'd post somethin up-

This existence a thin line
I bend lines and send shine
Stellar rhymes designed to help them find
A reason why weג€™re even alive
From peas in a pod to bein estranged
At times we all feel like Andy Dufresne
Redemption is passing
Fleeting at best
Heaps of stress keep comin
Till youג€™re creepin to death
Lifeג€™s a nosy teacher when youג€™re cheatin the test
Speakin of tests, Iג€™m freakin depressed
Unique in the best sorta way
Rather Dapper Dan from A to Z
But no Nas beside me
Divide things without goin to the lowest denominator
The mathematics ג€˜ll make God a hater
Nevada the same as Sodom, Gomorrah
Poor morals to blame for ya sorrow
Perceptions they stay changing
While gangbangers stay banging


In tune like antennas in a world thatג€™s steered digital
A mere minimum of visuals is critical to get it through
To a place weג€™re not pitiful, getting fooled up in a school
Tentacles retracting, when instead we should be interacting

[Comedy Quaddafi]

Redemption is passing
Fleeting at best
Heaps of stress keep comin
Till youג€™re creepin to death
Lifeג€™s a nosy teacher when youג€™re cheatin the test
Speakin of tests, Iג€™m freakin depressed

In tune like antennas in a world thatג€™s steered digital
A mere minimum of visuals is critical to get it through
To a place weג€™re not pitiful, getting fooled up in a school
Tentacles retracting, when instead we should be interacting

This I like and I don't think the rest is as good to be honest. For some reason I like it a little less when your rhymes are more traditional rap, in this piece.

[unclebengi]

yeah it's a little all over the place, thanks for the feedback though. Probably been a couple years since I've written anything, so it just felt good to get something out. I hear you about traditional rap though, sometimes it's hard to point out cliches in your own writing, while you can spot them so easily in someone else's.

[unclebengi]

the strange color of her body's dropping tears
was passed down from bloodlines running through years
my ethereal model cuddled in blood and black lace
burning with desire brushing ash off her face
her skirt was breezing as passing wind blows
posing outside a house with laughing windows

liked this segment a lot...BTW what are the names of the movies? I probably haven't heard of any, but it'd be cool to see where you fit them in.

[Comedy Quaddafi]

The bolded bits are movie-titles. Thx for reading.

your vice is a locked room and only i have the key
answer my plea, i might let you look inside and see
a blizzard eurpts forming dark clouds as i begin
dreaming at the cathedral, i see a lizard inside a woman's skin
shes romantic and reveals a sordid feeling she keeps
but i hear it every night because she talks in her sleep
mahogany hair and appealing lips shining deep red
a vertigo inside them concealing sleeping secrets
her torso curves from all corners of the earth, far apart
a tormented canvas with all the colors of the dark
face off a mannequin, empty and stiff
my razor's tip caressed her with a gentle kiss
the strange color of her body's dropping tears
was passed down from bloodlines running through years
my ethereal model cuddled in blood and black lace
burning with desire brushing ash off her face
her skirt was breezing as passing wind blows
posing outside a house with laughing windows
the impulse was too strong to not act on
strange and beautiful, unusual, a black swan
once madly in love, but now badly scorned
the leather cracks as i put my black gloves back on

[Spartan]

I incorporated 10 different movie-titles in to the verse and I did have a specific actress in mind somewhat

Edwige Fenech?

Clever stuff by the way. None of those titles feel out of place or forced with the rest of your verse.

[Comedy Quaddafi]

^ Bingo!

And thanks! The quality of something so reference-based is how natural it comes together. Cool to also have someone familar with the movies read it.

[JaH BLaZe]

smoke a padron in this. aint no one here to complain of the clouds
mad snow on the ground ,and nothing has changed around, except the pitch of the sounds
with a tongue so quick on the words, in cyphas spit at herbs, no contest a nigga with a long coat to lid the herbs
the big dick wonda, got mad game like sony but most of yall dont really
know me, see a style so slick to get thru this cold hell tundra

[Comedy Quaddafi]

im cold like november, opposite of kenya
igloo houseboat floating on some timber
december, fluffy gloves and a cashmere scarf
helping the kids to build a snowman in the park
nose be a carrot, eyes is cherries
bears be hibernating cuz they can't find berries
she was walking outside, bare, in a skirt and pantyhose
got a bad cold so it told the hoe 'blow yo nose -
i wanna get behind ya, and defrost your +icesickle vagina+
if i was puffy i would shoot a viral and sign ya'
outside of my local bodega hail is pouring
globals are warming but there's an icestorm-warning
relax with hot coco and brownies from florence
downloading porn, yeah, seeding all the torrents

[Psychosis]

I have to agree with Quaddafi in regards to the sections he quoted as best, though I strongly prefer the first part of the quote as it seemed to flow nicely and I found it relatable.

I also haven't written in years, but was recently inspired to write something. I found it a little tricky getting back into the old rhythm myself.

[Psychosis]

Thanks. This was honestly not about anything at all, I was just really feelin the beat at the moment and felt like writing so I jotted some shit down, but I definitely pride myself in the rhyme scheme. I feel like sometimes it doesn't matter what is being said, so long as it sounds dope.

I definitely got this sense, especially since there were sections of 2, 3 or 4 consecutive lines that I thought were strong, connected and had a good 'flow' where other times things seemed tangentially related. It made it a little hard to follow but the rhyme structure kept me reading.

[Psychosis]

There was some interesting alliteration of 's' sounds throughout, particularly in the first section. I thought the opening few lines were the best.

[Psychosis]

First writing attempt in years:

Troubleג€™s that we donג€™t come out the womb in bubble wrap
Been born without armor since the time our knuckles dragged
Struggle past the phase where youג€™re wild as a jungle cat
Gotta clean up and shave down, but soon the stubbleג€™s back
Find all you build crumbles, cracks, turns into rubble fast
Argue and get a rebuttal that, leaves you pummeled flat
There are no subtle jabs, just haymakers and low blows
Youג€™ll know folks that showboat with no acres and no dough
Slow pokes whose talents are so-so wanting to go pro
Joe blows that canג€™t find success when itג€™s at a stoneג€™s throw
Homegrown, fucking up from the first floor to the ozone
Sitting with skills they donג€™t hone, they relax and postpone
With oxycodone, though the ambitious ainג€™t better
Vicious for riches shittinג€™ on wishes together
Earning stitches as theyג€™re burning bridges forever
All these bitches are striving and inching for treasure
Itג€™s a switch you canג€™t measure that goes on in the brain
Causinג€™ the sane to change into pawns in a game
And then the poor don't reach for whatג€™s hard to attain
Dodging the blame, find fees the rich will charge inhumane,
Till just the hope of lotto tickets softens the pain

[Comedy Quaddafi]

The first part until after the couplet in cursive is some of the best shit i've read in CTR. I'm completely humbled by your wordplay you even managed to put new life into the soul/sole thing.

"The slow pace was better when each of the steps were strong
But its not what you thought hops, you were wrong all along
The solemn song of us solipsists our obvious credentials
Float along the stream of consciousness, we're passing up potential"

Holy shit, man. It's very hard to write wordy stuff that also flows nice when you read it - it even has meaning so it's not forced in spite of the many multis. That was my favorite part.

[Comedy Quaddafi]

How come you stopped writing? Keep going because this is quite strong, especially the first 8 bars. Dug the boxing part especially, would've liked to have seen it being taken even further.

[Comedy Quaddafi]

flashing cufflinks for this floozy at the bar
together in this world, but alone, it's bizzare
sent her a wink and caught a smile from afar
i'm just a genious, but this girl thinks i'm a star
got so many ideas they can't fit into my thoughts
she got thick legs that barely fit into her shorts
looking like wild game and i'm just hunting for sport
i'm a sore loser and could never accept a loss
excuse my manners, something i was never taught
but we could ditch the compass and just get lost
there's so many places in the world we could explore
i could carry you elegantly through the front-door
i suggest we start in the kitchen and move to the floor
weather's nice in florence, have you been there before?
we could visit the florist and empty the ferragamo-store
drink merlot by moonlight in gondoliers offshore
lease a g5 and fly around on a world-tour
you hesitate a second, saying you're not sure
cherry-colored lips but your eyes are azure
your smile is rich but your attitude is poor
understand i could replace you with many more
i just saw your friend, now i don't like you anymore

[Sumthin_Funky]

This was ill. Had a really nice flow.

[unclebengi]

Wow this was dope...I can see why you could relate to the passage in the verse I posted because this part conveys a similar message-

Find all you build crumbles, cracks, turns into rubble fast
Argue and get a rebuttal that, leaves you pummeled flat
There are no subtle jabs, just haymakers and low blows

But it really get's cookin at the end here-

Vicious for riches shittinג€™ on wishes together
Earning stitches as theyג€™re burning bridges forever
Their greed ainג€™t stopped by hitches or glitches in weather
All these bitches are striving and inching for treasure
Itג€™s a switch you canג€™t measure that goes on in the brain
Causinג€™ the sane to change into pawns in a game
And then the poor don't reach for whatג€™s hard to attain
Dodging the blame, find fees the rich will charge inhumane,
Till just the hope of lotto tickets softens the pain

The concepts are simple, but significant, and your making the rhyme your bitch. It looks good written, but it would sound even better.

[unclebengi]

Starts off good, but it gets a lil cheesy as it goes on. This type of stuff is real hard to do and not sound cheesy though I guess.

[unclebengi]

You show a good ability to rhyme all sorts of words and phrases that don't look like they should rhyme, but you don't end up saying much in this verse. Just try to use that ability to write verses on a certain topic or even theme and your shit will pop.