Things In Movies You Never Want to See Again

cascarrabias · Post by **cascarrabias** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 10:25 pm

When a character has an introspective moment or makes a life-changing decision and it's raining at the same time. Give me a break.

Or

When a movie ends and it's a freeze frame of some of the characters smiling.

Gregg Popabitch1 · Post by **Gregg Popabitch1** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 10:31 pm

i tell you what i can't get enough of

the john woo technique.

where the main character is supposed to do somemthing gully, he enters the scene in slow motion with doves flying every which way.

StormShadow · Post by **StormShadow** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 10:47 pm

Harvey Keitel's dick.

still illiterate · Post by **still illiterate** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 10:56 pm

the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.

Lance Goodthrust · Post by **Lance Goodthrust** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:09 am

Shot of injured sports star watching or listening to his teammates game while he holds back his emotions.

The montage of all the cops/soldiers/action heroes checking and loading their weapons to a rockin' sound track.

StormShadow · Post by **StormShadow** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:12 am

still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.

Happiness is supposed to be deep and meaningful? Shit is just dark comedy.

Money Gripp · Post by **Money Gripp** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:20 am

Cheesy love stories set against the backdrop of cataclysmic natural or man-made disasters.

Sankofa · Post by **Sankofa** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 7:03 am

StormShadow wrote:Harvey Keitel's dick.

good call

agent b · Post by **agent b** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 11:09 am

briefcases getting accidentally switched at the airport

Move Free · Post by **Move Free** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 12:01 pm

carrot top

De Seven Free · Post by **De Seven Free** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:57 pm

still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.

I didn't think Kids was guilty of this (the shocking stuff serves an important purpose), but the other Larry Clark films I've seen are guilty as hell.

Spartan · Post by **Spartan** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 1:57 pm

Villains with British accents.

Car chases where the windscreen shatters in one scene and the next scene its ok.

That deep voiced guy that talks on the trailors of action flicks saying crap like "He's only got twenty four hours to save the city blah blah blah".

De Seven Free · Post by **De Seven Free** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 2:00 pm

Computers running non-existant operating systems with massive on-screen type. They are sometimes capable of extrapolating detail from security camera footage that isn't there.

dmwm · Post by **dmwm** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 4:37 pm

Typical Arabic Terrorist trying to gain money by the expense of American human lives.

HopeLess · Post by **HopeLess** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 4:52 pm

Gregg Popabitch wrote:i tell you what i can't get enough of

the john woo technique.

where the main character is supposed to do somemthing gully, he enters the scene in slow motion with doves flying every which way.

Sad isn't it? Action movies have killed what used to be cool action stuff.

The two-pistol John Woo style has been so over done that it's almost painful to watch now. Every piece of shit action movie without any type of originality uses slow mow to cover up the fact the movies action scenes suck.

*Sigh*

Also, the over use of "bullet time", even done in parody, needs to go.

Trademark · Post by **Trademark** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 4:58 pm

coach takes over crummy littleleague/jrhigh/highschool team because of so and so reason(usually a punishment of some sorts) gets team back in shape with practice montages and or strange motivation techniques. Wins championship while even being offered his job back or being told a speech from the rival coach like "alright you've proved your point give up" or "your team just isn't good enough. Your kids can't beat my kids.."

sports movies in general need to get some new angles, and or plotlines...

T-Wrex · Post by **T-Wrex** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 5:51 pm

Sankofa wrote:
StormShadow wrote:Harvey Keitel's dick.
good call

LOL.. When I saw "Things In Movies You Never Want to See Again", I thought to myself.. "ha.. I should say Kevin Bacon's thing.... but I don't wanna get called

by everybody.."

SeaTownBlues · Post by **SeaTownBlues** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 7:07 pm

still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.

The Butterfly Effect

The only reason that piece of asshole movie got released is because it had some of the most fucked up imagery of all time.

zizek · Post by **zizek** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 7:57 pm

"Documentaries" that ironically use corny stock footage from the 50s & excerpts from educational films in an attempt to disguise the fact that the "movie" is just a bunch of talking heads.

Dids · Post by **Dids** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 8:32 pm

T-Wrex wrote:
Sankofa wrote:
StormShadow wrote:Harvey Keitel's dick.
good call
LOL.. When I saw "Things In Movies You Never Want to See Again", I thought to myself.. "ha.. I should say Kevin Bacon's thing.... but I don't wanna get called by everybody.."

My first thought was "Bruce Willis's dick" then it was just "Bruce Willis".

I agree with Cas on the rain. Rain is used a dramatic device way the fuck too much. Deep moments happen in the sun too...

waldo ptarmigan · Post by **waldo ptarmigan** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 8:58 pm

zizek wrote:"Documentaries" that ironically use corny stock footage from the 50s & excerpts from educational films in an attempt to disguise the fact that the "movie" is just a bunch of talking heads.

I AGREE WITH THIS SO MUCH. like every documentary does it now, even when there is no place for it.

still illiterate · Post by **still illiterate** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 9:03 pm

SeaTownBlues wrote:
still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.
The Butterfly Effect

The only reason that piece of asshole movie got released is because it had some of the most fucked up imagery of all time.

yep this is exactly the kind of movie that i mean.

still illiterate · Post by **still illiterate** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 9:05 pm

De Seven Free wrote:
still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.
I didn't think Kids was guilty of this (the shocking stuff serves an important purpose), but the other Larry Clark films I've seen are guilty as hell.

the thing with that movie is that it had no real plot, at least to me. it just seemed like scenes after scene that was supposed to shock us. It could have been much better if those scene were part of an actual good story. It was just boring more then anything.

still illiterate · Post by **still illiterate** » Sat Jun 04, 2005 9:25 pm

agent b wrote:briefcases getting accidentally switched at the airport

i never leave my briefcase unattended for this fact. movies totally skewed my view of reality in this regard.

T-Wrex · Post by **T-Wrex** » Sun Jun 05, 2005 8:48 pm

Dids wrote:
T-Wrex wrote:
Sankofa wrote:
StormShadow wrote:Harvey Keitel's dick.
good call
LOL.. When I saw "Things In Movies You Never Want to See Again", I thought to myself.. "ha.. I should say Kevin Bacon's thing.... but I don't wanna get called by everybody.."
My first thought was "Bruce Willis's dick" then it was just "Bruce Willis".

I agree with Cas on the rain. Rain is used a dramatic device way the fuck too much. Deep moments happen in the sun too...

ahhaha.. i think wangs should just be outlawed... peroid.. or given XXX ratings..

sneed · Post by **sneed** » Sun Jun 05, 2005 9:13 pm

stupid scenes where people are going to the airport and get stopped up at the metal detectors...

fucking sooooo overplayed in movies and tv...

SoulClap · Post by **SoulClap** » Sun Jun 05, 2005 9:46 pm

Spartan wrote:That deep voiced guy that talks on the trailors of action flicks saying crap like "He's only got twenty four hours to save the city blah blah blah".

Snuggles the DESTROYER · Sun Jun 05, 2005 9:48 pm

SoulClap wrote:
Spartan wrote:That deep voiced guy that talks on the trailors of action flicks saying crap like "He's only got twenty four hours to save the city blah blah blah".

ARNOLD SWARTZENEGGER IS LITTLE TORTILLA BOY

Rachel Hobozal · Post by **Rachel Hobozal** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 1:51 pm

Cable wrote:stupid scenes where people are going to the airport and get stopped up at the metal detectors...

fucking sooooo overplayed in movies and tv...

Fuck it, just airport scenes period; especially when there's a woman or man that's about to hop on a plane and leave their significant other behind "forever", but just when they're about to board the plane their man/woman screams at the top of their lungs for the other to stop. Then they run at each other for a huge hug/kiss/cry combo and the world seems fair and right.

shopvack · Post by **shopvack** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 1:59 pm

SeaTownBlues wrote:
still illiterate wrote:the shock technique. Disguise a bad movie as a deep and meaningful one by shocking the audience with 'intense' scenes and images. see, Happiness, Kids.
The Butterfly Effect

The only reason that piece of asshole movie got released is because it had some of the most fucked up imagery of all time.

side question: who else laughed when ashton fell on his face as a cripple?