Artie Lange Hospitalized

Dan · Post by **Dan** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 3:22 pm

Comedian Artie Lange has been hospitalized with an ailment that he is keeping private.

Howard Stern returns from break tomorrow and it looks like Artie won't be there. He missed most of December, too.

Rumors are circulating that Jim Breuer may be taking over Artie's spot on the show.

http://www.tmz.com/2010/01/03/artie-lan ... tern-show/

ObeseJesus · Post by **ObeseJesus** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 3:57 pm

fuck, that sucks. Artie is great on the show, it's sad how many problems dude has. Jim Breuer can be real fucking annoying, I hope he doesn't mess up the show.

Swipe · Post by **Swipe** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 4:12 pm

You'd have to be dumb not to have this dude in your death pool.

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 5:26 pm

This is the last year of Howard on Sirius anyways. No way Artie returns in full fashion. I do hope he recovers because he's been making strides at bettering himself.

Employee · Post by **Employee** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 5:34 pm

Philaflava wrote:This is the last year of Howard on Sirius anyways.

I haven't been listening to his show like I used to. Is he retiring...?

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 5:42 pm

Employee wrote:
Philaflava wrote:This is the last year of Howard on Sirius anyways.
I haven't been listening to his show like I used to. Is he retiring...?

More than likely. New married life shit. Travel, fuck you money and Oprah.

Dan · Post by **Dan** » Sun Jan 03, 2010 8:34 pm

Employee wrote:
Philaflava wrote:This is the last year of Howard on Sirius anyways.
I haven't been listening to his show like I used to. Is he retiring...?

This is the final year of Stern's contract.

I don't think he'll retire, he'll just it as a ploy to re-sign for an obscene amount of money for even less work than his current contract.

Raphael De La Ghetto · Mon Jan 04, 2010 6:11 am

Jim Breuer? Weak.

Stoop Kid · Post by **Stoop Kid** » Mon Jan 04, 2010 6:40 am

I like this dude. Manages to make getting porn stars to ride that mechanical dildo thing not creepy. Stern is totally creepy though.

Reason · Post by **Reason** » Mon Jan 04, 2010 2:46 pm

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Mon Jan 04, 2010 2:47 pm

Raphael De La Ghetto wrote:Jim Breuer? Weak.

Howard said that rumor was false today.

ackbar · Post by **ackbar** » Wed Jan 06, 2010 4:04 am

aids?

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 8:09 am

Stern sidekick in suicide try

Troubled comic Artie Lange landed in the hospital after stabbing himself nine times in an apparent suicide attempt, sources told The Post. Lange's frantic mom called 911 Saturday morning after she entered his Hoboken apartment and found the bloodied funnyman, a law-enforcement source said. Lange sustained six "hesitation wounds" and three deep plunges. A source close to Lange's management team confirmed that the Howard Stern sidekick stabbed himself, adding that his mother had come to visit him that day to drop off food. Surgeons managed to save Lange despite heavy bleeding. "We all have our demons," Stern said on-air this week, referring to Lange's past battles with addiction. "Artie has given this show tremendous moments of great comedy. He's a tremendous contributor. He is a good man. Don't forget how great he is."

Read more: http://www.newyorkpost.com/p/pagesix/st ... z0bvZhDDy8

Blockhead · Post by **Blockhead** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 10:19 am

JESUS.
attempting to stab yourself to death is just demented.

Nl5H · Post by **Nl5H** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 10:21 am

yeah, that is just really sick... i'm not really in the know on his life, but i assume no type of therapy ever worked for him?

rhickey · Post by **rhickey** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 10:26 am

Blockhead wrote:JESUS.
attempting to stab yourself to death is just demented.

Raphael De La Ghetto · Thu Jan 07, 2010 10:27 am

I think he tought the idea of therapy was for fags.
I remember reading how Charles Rocket slit his own throat to commit suicide and thinking how that has to be one of the worst ways to go out.

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 10:27 am

9 times though? why not just take some pills or use 1 bullet?

Blockhead · Post by **Blockhead** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 11:08 am

Philaflava wrote:9 times though? why not just take some pills or use 1 bullet?

that's what i'm saying. the ill shit is that it said there were three hesitations stabs and then some deep ones. i can't even fathom how fucked up you have to be to get through the initial weak stabs and really go for the gold.

Trademark · Post by **Trademark** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:16 pm

Blockhead wrote:
Philaflava wrote:9 times though? why not just take some pills or use 1 bullet?
that's what i'm saying. the ill shit is that it said there were three hesitations stabs and then some deep ones. i can't even fathom how fucked up you have to be to get through the initial weak stabs and really go for the gold.

exactly, why would that ever be your chosen form of suicide, jesus christ man....

YouTube · Post by **Philaflava** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:20 pm

depression is one thing but you really have to hate yourself to stab yourself 9 times.

Reason · Post by **Reason** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:23 pm

is there ANY way he wasn't massively fucked up on drugs/alcohol while continuing to stab himself?

Blockhead · Post by **Blockhead** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:23 pm

He's on some
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/g0bZtf5MCzY&hl ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/g0bZtf5MCzY&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

type shit.

Reason · Post by **Reason** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:27 pm

man this sucks. when i heard him on the adam carolla podcast a few months ago he seemed fine. damn shame

Reggie · Post by **Reggie** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 12:54 pm

Yeah but think about the rap cred he's acquired.

Brougham33 · Post by **Brougham33** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 2:43 pm

downtown jewelry bryan · Thu Jan 07, 2010 3:10 pm

as his mom came to drop off some food. wtf man.

Employee · Post by **Employee** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 4:00 pm

Fuck this fat slob. He stabbed himself nine times..? Time for ninety in a locked, private facility. If he fails after that, fuck 'em. Yeah, you're fat and depressed and have an affinity for heroin. There's never been anyone like you before.

He almost ruins the show. Howard is a nice guy for carrying this sack of shit around.

chump change · Post by **chump change** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 4:02 pm

Brougham33 wrote:

tehgiftofgab · Post by **tehgiftofgab** » Thu Jan 07, 2010 4:03 pm

fuck..